after 15 minutes wrote previous post,
i scrolled down my fb home and guess what i've read
Success is really attained by him who purifies it, And failure is really suffered by him who pollutes it.
Surah Ash-Shams #9-10
surah ash-shams 91:1-10
The first part deals with three things:
1-That just as the sun and the moon, the day and the night, the earth and the sky, are different from each other and contradictory in their effects and results, so are the good and the evil different front each other and contradictory in their effects and results; they are neither alike in their outward appearance nor can they be alike in their results.
2-That Allah after giving the human self powers of the body, sense and mind has not left it uninformed in the world, but has instilled into his unconscious by means of a natural inspiration the distinction between good and evil, right and wrong, and the sense of the good to be good and of the evil to be evil.
3-That the future of man depends on how by using the powers of discrimination, will and judgement that Allah has endowed him with, he develops the good and suppresses the evil tendencies of the self. If he develops the good inclination and frees his self of the evil inclinations, he will attain to eternal success, and if, on the contrary, he suppresses the good and promotes the evil, he will meet with disappointment and failure. Al-Tustari (d. 896), a Sufi and scholar of the Qur'an, mentions
read more about ash-shams on wikiBy the day when it reveals her [the sun],He said:This means: the light of faith removes the darkness of ignorance and extinguishes the flames of the Fire. 
it stunned me,
after wondered about those words and think deeply about it,
it somehow answers some of my worries,
how can i relate it with my problems? i can conclude that everything that happen has it reasons, but that reasons can be connected/answered by our past, present or even future, maybe we didn't see the reasons and the result now, but Insyaallah it will be on the future.
it's me who thinks what i've been bad, it's me who don't Syukur with the blessing He gave me, what i need to do is to purifies my failures, i don't really need to focus about my failures if it only makes me down, all i need to do is to focus about what i've been right that can make me keep moving forward about my life, endure the pain, endure the failures, take the good thing, learn from the failures.
we just mustn't give up . . . just don't give up . . . yeah, don't give up till your last blood . . . yosh! i mustn't give up, KEEP MOVING FORWARD